Minutes

UNF – CDRC Parent Organization

March 12, 2008

Parent Organization Meeting

Ollie Koala Fundraiser

Jessica began the meeting with a discussion about the Ollie Koala fundraiser. For our one night event, we raised $60 for the organization to be used toward the purchase of gifts for teacher appreciation. The manager for Ollie Koala’s said they would be sending the check as soon as possible.

The Usbourne Book Fair

The Usborne Book Fair was a success. The center sold over $500 worth of books. Due to the volume of sales from CDRC parents, the center received over $200 worth of free books from Usborne. Cheryl Bistricky, the sales representative for Usborne, said that CDRC parents placed a lot of orders online and that it was the most online orders she has ever had. Books have already arrived from Usborne and are available for pick-up in the main office or in your child’s swing folder.

NAEYC Accreditation

The NAEYC Accreditation went well. NAEYC visited the center for evaluation and Pam and Sharon feel like the center passed. However, on the off chance they do not pass accreditation, Pam and Sharon are looking into alternative accreditation organizations to use as a back-up to prevent any loss of funding from the CCAMPIS Grant.

Upcoming Events

The March 25^th trip to Cummer is canceled. Douglas Anderson High School will be hosting an art display at the Cummer and March 25^th is the opening night. There will be no trip to the Cummer. Instead, on March 26^th, we will be sponsoring a Night Walk at the UNF Trails.

Registration for enrollment at CDRC

The center will begin registration for summer and fall enrollment. They will be sending out an announcement detailing dates and times for registration.

Date:	Child’s Status
April 7 – 11^th	Currently enrolled students	Wanting to decrease their hours
April 14-18^th	Currently enrolled students	Wanting to keep their hours or increase their hours
April 28^th	Open to everyone: students, faculty and general public	Summer and fall registration
May 5-9^th	Open to everyone	Registering only for Summer or Fall

Next Parent Organization Meetings

Wednesday, April 9^th, from 6:00 – 7:30 PM.

The scheduled meetings below will focus on Conscious Discipline; there will be little to no parent org. agenda.

Wednesday, May 7^th from 6:00 – 7:30 PM

Wednesday, May 21^st from 6:00 – 7:30 PM

Teacher Appreciation

Jessica suggested that we have something from the kids and then something from the parents. Jessica, Stephanie, and Teresa discussed options in emails and Jessica presented the ideas to the group. For the gift from the children, it was agreed that a video of the children to all of the teachers would be a unique and neat gift. Jessica’s husband, Jason, agreed to compile a presentation video of the kids for the teachers. Jessica and Teresa said they would video tape the children where the children could talk about their teachers and give any comments they have about school/teachers…etc. For the teachers and the lead assistants, it was agreed that all would receive gift cards from the parents as a thank-you.

We discussed sending out the donation letter by the end of the week and having all monies in by March 28^th. Teresa said she would send out emails and flyers to the parents. (The emails have been sent out on Saturday, March 16, 2008, and the flyers went into the children’s swing folders on Friday, March 14, 2008.) A reminder email will be sent out to the parents on March 24, 2008.

Parent Organization Meeting in August

We discussed starting the Parent Organization Meetings in August to help with Family Fest. The new Parent Organization for fall 2008 will meet on Thursday, August 28^th. Primary agenda will be planning the Family Fest which occurs in October. Pam indicated that she will need lots of help with the upcoming Family Fest and would like parents to become more involved with the planning of the festival this year.

Conscious Discipline – Module #7

Pam began the Conscious Discipline session with a review of the first 6 modules we covered in previous meetings.

Pam reiterated the importance of Conscious Discipline and the goal of conscious discipline:

Positive Discipline	Negative Discipline
Best in each child	Something bad
Best in each moment (i.e. glass ½ full rather than ½ empty)	Eliminate through punishment
Teaching moment
Strengthen the child

Pam proceeded to ask parents if anyone has had an interaction since our last session where they saw the child “calling for love” rather than misbehaving or did anyone have success in making the distinction between asking for understanding vs. asking for information. Parents shared their experiences regarding these two situations. Pam also asked parents if they were more aware of their communication style. Were you more aggressive, passive, or assertive in communicating with your child/children?

Conscious Discipline #7

Discipline is an opportunity to teach, not punish.

Parents were asked “Why do children misbehave? “

Responses:

• Don’t understand
• They are trying to get your attention
• They look to challenge you
• They just want “to do it”; they have some goal or objective and they want to fulfill that goal. (I.e. They really want to eat that cookie!!) Need to satisfy some want.
• Tired
• They want to try you
• Poor impulse control
• Lack verbal ability

Parents/teachers/adults

- Typically look at behavior as bad, disrespectful, unacceptable etc.

- We attach negative connotations to it and respond accordingly.

Children don’t know how to respond

- Use this as an opportunity to teach them

- Children (and adults) often play one of two roles: aggressor or victim

- Opportunity to teach the child skills to integrate him/herself into another child’s play

Parents were asked to answer the following question:

1. Think back to a conflict between children in which someone ended up getting hurt physically or emotionally. What was your first response? Did you attend to the victim or the aggressor?

We always go to the victim first and we make sure we empower the victim. We empathize with them and then we add words to their experience, such as “what happened? How it felt? Did you like it? Then tell him…”

The aggressor is always attended to second and then you help the aggressor find the words to express his or her feelings.

For example: “You wanted the ______ball_____ so you ____hit_____ Joey. You didn’t know the words to use. You may not ____hit_____ Joey because ____he would not give you the ball _____. When you want ____the ball____ use the words _____It's my turn for the ball. Please give it to me. _____

Scenarios we discussed at the meeting:

Zach hits Hunter to get a car.

Zach hits Mom/Dad because he doesn’t want to take a bath.

Victims come to use to solve their problems, (i.e. tattling)

Common responses to tattling

- Are you telling me to hurt or help

- Go solve it

- Gave them the words

- Don’t be a cry baby

Your job is to help them learn to solve their problems. Until age 8, this is your job.

Use the ALSO technique

A – Ask: Did you like it?

L – Listen to your child’s response

S – Say to the child, “Go tell__________. I don’t like it when you___________ me.”

O – Observe the upcoming interaction.

You want to empower the victim.

If they are timid, have them match their voice to yours. Instead of a small voice “I don’t like it.” Have them raise their voice to be assertive and help them learn to do this by having them match their voice to yours.

Make sure the aggressor knows you are there and that you are there to support the victim's attempts to be assertive.

Teach the aggressor the proper way to behave.

For the Aggressor use PURE:

P – State the child’s Positive intent: “You wanted to ____________________” Let them know you understand what they were trying to do.

U – State the behavior that is Unacceptable. “_____________________ is unacceptable.”

R – State the Reason. “____________ing hurts.”

E – Explore alternatives: “Let’s talk about what else you could do. For example, when you want to play, say ‘May I play with you?”

Pam had the parents divide up into groups of 3. Parents were asked to take on the roles of aggressor, victim (tattling to coach), coach.

Ask “Did you like it?”

Listen to child’s response.

Say to the child “Go tell______. I don’t like it when you___________”. Observe the upcoming interaction. Is it super passive, assertive, or aggressive?

Remember – aggressor has a choice to do it aggressively or __________.

Reinforce good choices! “You did it! You asked…”